Fertility treatments

I'am on day two of my fertility treatments. I started them yesterday which was 04/13/2010. So far the only side effects I have had are some cramps. My doctor did tell me that this could happen so I wasn't worried when they started. I do not know if these treatments will do anything or not but it is so worth the effort of trying them. I will do anything to be a mommy again, its just a matter if God thinks that I'am ready to be a mother. I sure hope he does. I just don't understand why he would make it so difficult to conceive now, but when I was younger I was finding myself pregnant when I wasn't quite ready. I do not think that my kids were ever a mistake or an accident. I love them with all my heart and I wish that they were still with me now. But now that my husband and I are old enough and stable enough we are told "NO!" Maybe these treatments will be a "YES!" All I know is that I'am so ready to bring another child into this world and give that child the best life it could ever want!

My new found discovery

Today I had an appointment with my doctor. I was in shambles, trying to figure out ways to deal with this PCOS. I wanted to go over recent events with my doctor. I also wanted to ask a few questions. Well I didn't get the answers I wanted but I did get good news. There are a few infertility treatments that we can do. Of course my insurance won't cover them but they are something I can afford. I am so happy! I know there is only a 60% chance that they will work but its a sliver of hope that I didn't have before...

New things going on...

As you all know I have something called PID... Well on top of that I now have something called Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome. This too is very painful. It is taking alot out of me... And this to causes infertility... Its seems like its just another thing getting up in my face and telling me that I'm not meant to be a mother... I had a baby when I was thirteen and another when I was seventeen. My daughter passed away in October 2005. My son was born in January of 2005 and was put up for adoption in April 2005.... I had two beautiful shots at mother hood and I let them both slip through the cracks... Maybe this is Gods way of punishing me for giving my child away... Or for just having them too young... I don't know but I feel like a failure all over again...